13 Movie Kisses That Made Everyone Ask, 'WTF?'

Jacob Shelton
May 10, 2022 352.0K views 13 items
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Vote up the movie kisses that never should have happened.

Nothing sucks the air out of a movie faster than a supposedly romantic kiss that comes out of nowhere. It doesn't matter if you're watching a sci-fi epic or a '90s Disney movie about a kid blowing through a million dollars in a week, unnecessary romantic subplots are a surefire way to turn an audience against a movie in a matter of moments.

What determines whether or not a movie kiss is inexplicable? Many factors go into this sort of thing: Do the leads have chemistry? Has a romance between the characters been building throughout the film or does it just sort of happen out of nowhere? Is the kiss really creepy? Does it make your skin crawl? Is it boring? If you're asking yourself these questions while watching Angelina Jolie or Chris Evans kiss literally anyone, then you've stumbled upon an inexplicable movie kiss.

None of the following kisses are "good," but there are a few collected here that will make you want to spray the actors down with a firehouse just so they'll break it up.

  • It's hard to believe anyone has to say this, but adults and kids shouldn't be on any list about movie kisses. You wouldn't think that's a big, bold statement, but movies in the '80s and '90s were full of this kind of thing, with one of the most blatant versions of the events taking place in Blank Check. In this film, 12-year-old Preston gets his hands on a cool million dollars and uses it to buy a house, toys, and whatever else he wants. His spending spree immediately makes him a target of the FBI, who assume he's a part of a money laundering scheme.

    The FBI sends the sexy, adult agent Shay Stanley to investigate. After fending off a gangster who would very much like the million dollars, she has a heart-to-heart chat with Preston about how the important things in life have little to do with money and everything to do with the relationships people form with one another. Then she kisses him. It's legit crazy and incredibly illegal. You can literally chop the kiss out of this scene and the only thing that would change about the movie is that it wouldn't be a litmus test for creeps. Yikes.

    1,865 votes
  • Howard the Duck is about as weird as it gets when it comes to big-budget theatrically released films. If you haven't watched this truly strange comic book movie, it's about an anthropomorphized alien duck who comes to Earth and falls in love with Lea Thompson.

    To make things even weirder, Thompson's character, Beverly, gets the full-on hots for this 3-foot-tall talking duck. About halfway through the movie, Howard stays the night with Bev and she puts some extreme moves on him. How extreme? Even Howard is crawling out of his skin by the end of the scene. The '80s were definitely weird, but this is something else entirely.

    1,349 votes
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    1,306 VOTES

    Finn And Rose Tico, ‘The Last Jedi’

    Of all the kisses in the Star Wars universe, this might be the most misguided. There are takes upon takes about The Last Jedi, but the one thing that unites audiences about the film is that it's pretty weird when Rose and Finn kiss after the Battle of Crait. Everything about this scene is technically romantic. The two leads are great. They're covered in sweat and ash from battle, and there's a dang explosion in the background right before the moment at hand. But then Rose plants a little kiss on Finn's lips and all the air is sucked out of the movie.

    The weirdness of this moment has nothing to do with Finn and Rose as characters (or John Boyega and Kelly Marie Tran - they're both great), it's just that they have zero sexual chemistry on screen. Do we want to see them pulling off a space casino heist? Absolutely. But that doesn't mean they have to have a romantic relationship, too.

    1,306 votes
  • John And Sarah, 'Red Notice'
    Photo: Netflix

    Red Notice takes viewers on a globetrotting heist adventure with Dwayne Johnson, Ryan Reynolds, and Gal Gadot. Reynolds plays an international thief, Johnson plays the FBI agent tracking him down, and Gadot plays the thief throwing the two men for a loop. As fun as this movie sounds, there is zero sexual chemistry between any of the actors on screen, and that's what makes the kiss so inexplicable.

    Spoilers for Red Notice to follow immediately: The film climaxes with the reveal that Johnson and Gadot have been working together since before the movie started. Johnson is actually a con man and Gadot is his partner in love and theft. The reveal comes hand in hand with a kiss between the two stars that's supposed to be a major reveal, but it's just kind of weird.

    John and Sarah share a kiss so devoid of passion that the only way to make sense of it is to believe Johnson and Gadot were individually green-screened into the film and smooshed together to form something like a kiss. If that turns out to be the case, we'll be team Red Notice until the sun explodes.

    994 votes
  • Juliet and Mark's story is easily the most unsettling in Love Actually. Juliet is married to Mark's best friend, and even though Mark is head over heels, hopelessly in love with her, he still treats her like a stray dog. Of course, that's only to the untrained eye. Careful viewers will notice that Mark ruins Juliet's wedding video by only focusing on her in extreme close-ups while also giving her moon eyes any time she's in the room.

    This non-relationship comes to a head on Christmas Eve when Mark shows up with a bunch of large note cards and a confession of his love. Juliet, so taken by this out-of-nowhere admission, leaves the house she shares with her husband to make out with Mark in the snow. As romantic as this moment is, it's still really off-putting. It may be a pity kiss, but it's still wildly inappropriate, and rewards Mark's creepy behavior. Inexplicable doesn't even begin to explain this moment - it's just really sad.

    920 votes
  • Steve Rogers and Peggy Carter have a romance for the ages. The same can't be said of the "relationship" that Steve and Peggy's niece, Sharon, have. In Captain America: Civil War, Steve and many of his fellow Avengers go head-to-head with Tony Stark over legislation controlling the use of their powers. This stand-off is one of the most intriguing moments in the MCU and it asks fans to choose sides in a friendship-ruining showdown.

    Along the way, Steve gets help from the niece of his long-lost love. Sharon Carter is on the same moral wavelength as Steve, so it makes sense that the two are quick allies. However, the thing that doesn't track is the kiss Cap plants on Sharon at the end of the film. It's a strange moment, not only because Cap was in L-U-V love with Sharon's aunt, but also because they really just met. To complicate matters even more, when the Avengers defeat Thanos and Steve goes back in time to actually live his life, that technically makes him Peggy's uncle, right? It's best not to think about it.

    1,304 votes
  • The Tourist is an absolutely mind-boggling viewing experience. Johnny Depp plays Frank, a fuddy-duddy American who falls in love with the mysterious Elise, played by Angelina Jolie. It's sort of a comic romantic spy thriller. Maybe? It's not actually clear if the comedy is purposeful, but if you go into The Tourist looking for a serious thriller, you're in the wrong place. 

    Onto the kiss. There's a distinct lack of chemistry between Jolie and Depp that makes the whole film strange to watch. It doesn't help that Jolie is speaking with an exaggerated English accent not fit for human consumption. Right, the kiss. Stashed away in a European hotel room, Jolie leans in to lock lips with Depp, and in spite of the megaton amount of star power these two carry, the kiss is like watching two cardboard cut-outs rubbing faces with one another. The fact that there's a cutaway to Interpol agents taking pictures of them makes the whole thing even stranger. It's like the agents know how weird the scene is.

    642 votes
  • Casey is a former Navy Seal posing as a chef, and Jordan Tate is a Playboy Playmate brought on board the decommissioned USS Missouri to entertain the remaining crew. It's a weird flex, but it's the kind of thing that happens in '90s action movies. The party on board the Missouri is quickly thrown into disarray when former CIA mercenaries board the ship and attempt to steal a set of missiles so they can sell them on the black market.

    Bad luck for the mercenaries because Casey is itching to bust some skulls. Jordan helps him as much as she can, but for the most part she's relegated to classic sidekick stuff like working the radio and getting kidnapped by the mercenaries. When Casey finally takes control of the Missouri and saves the day, he plants a big ol' smooch on Jordan. The kiss itself is gross, but under the circumstances, these two should really be jumping into therapy, not a make-out sesh.

    399 votes
  • Wait, what? Why are these two Jedi kissing? Aren't they brother and sister? Any of those questions are appropriate for the finale of Rise of Skywalker when Kylo Ren and Rey share a smooch after the former Sith Lord brings her back to life after she destroys Palpatine once and for all.

    Luckily these two aren't related at all, so the kiss is totally chill (we're not sure about the rules in a galaxy far, far away, but romantic siblings are likely frowned upon), but their parting kiss is still a head-scratcher. Not only have these two never shared an iota of on-screen chemistry, but Kylo also spent much of the first two films of this series trying to kill Rey through various sci-fi means (lightsabers, giant lasers, Force choking). So why the kiss? Maybe the forces that be just wanted to send the audience home with a smile, or maybe it would have been a total drag to see Kylo turn to pure energy after defeating the big bad. Either way, it's still a moment that takes audiences out of the film in a major way.

    1,457 votes
  • This is a weird one, folks. The inexplicable nature of this kiss goes deeper than the lack of chemistry between Daniel Radcliffe and Bonnie Wright - they're both young actors and it's kind of weird that they're kissing on camera. There's no narrative reason these two teens need to kiss, but fans know Harry and Ginny marry following the events of the next installment. To not have them kiss at some point would be equally weird, maybe? It's really a no-win scenario over here in the Wizarding World.

    Aside from the weird fan service, this kiss comes in the middle of what is easily the most intense installment of the Harry Potter series. There are zombies. Harry and Dumbledore have a pretty rough go of things, and Draco spends most of the movie training to commit murder. Why stop for a fleeting teenage kiss? No offense to fans of wizard romance, but this movie doesn't need this scene at all.

    1,413 votes
  • Jurassic World is the definition of "why is this here?" Not only is it a retread of a fantastic Spielberg movie, but everything feels a little too cynical and contrived - especially the kiss shared between rivals Claire, the chief operations officer of Jurassic World, and Owen, the Velociraptor handler at the park.

    Moments before a dinosaur can bite into Owen's face and chew him up like a little dino snack, Claire pops it with a rifle over and over again. It's a pretty cool moment for a character who hasn't had anything to do but complain and run around in heels for much of the movie. But then comes the kiss.

    Owen stands, bewildered. He can't believe he's still alive and that his savior was none other than the woman he's been arguing with for the complete run time of the film. He does what any toxically masculine man would do - he grabs Claire and starts making out with her. Aside from the fact that dinosaurs are running amok all around them and it's not really time for a heavy smooch session, these two can't stand each other. Why would they kiss?

    1,124 votes
  • Everyone expects Superman and Lois Lane to kiss. They're a canonical couple in the world of comic books and superhero movies, after all. But Man of Steel makes the case for never seeing these two lock lips ever again. This origin story of Superman takes the audience from Kal-El's arrival on Earth to his battle with General Zod, a mad Kryptonian who seeks to terraform Earth into a place that parallels his home planet.

    Superman is able to stop Zod's plan, but not before much of Metropolis is turned into a desolate wasteland. Moments after witnessing the complete destruction of her hometown and witnessing two aliens beating the crap out of each other, Lois does what anyone would do - she starts making out with Superman while her colleagues watch. As if that's not awkward enough, Lois interrupts the kiss to say that things "go downhill after the first kiss." Isn't it the wrong time for this kind of thing?

    800 votes
  • Ratatouille tells the classic story of a young rat who dreams of being chef. To live his dream, Remy the rat guides the movements of trash boy Linguini and turns him into a culinary star. All of that is great, and if there wasn't a weird love angle, Ratatouille might be one of the greatest films ever projected in a cinema. But then there's that dang kiss.

    Linguini and Colette, the restaurant's rôtisseur, have a tenuous relationship at best. He's actually terrible at his job and she knows she should be running the operation. During the scene in question, Colette is literally moments away from blasting Linguini with a hot dash of pepper spray, but Remy pushes his human marionette into Colette and the kiss is apparently so good that Colette decides not to fend off her accidental attacker.

    899 votes